holistically inspired.

Considering we spent Christmas back with extended family in Nova Scotia this year, this should be my favourite memory right? Or Sophie’s first actual Christmas that she could participate in?

Well, my favourite moment this Christmas actually took place several days before: at an Irving Big Stop.

A truck stop??? Yes. A truck stop.

The Christmas holiday season leaves me feeling very detached. Black Friday shopping frenzies…trampled to death employee…people thoughtlessly and guiltily throwing money at people fundraising not even giving it a second thought at what or why they are supporting, nor care (By the way, Cure for Breast Cancer Corporation…you have a whole month…it’s called October. Really, for Christmas could you please remove yourselves from the mall so that people looking for money to help people with immediate needs – like food for the holidays – and not to pay the 7 figure salaries of your executives could get a fair shake…thanks). The holidays is such a whirlwind of shopping & frenzy that it’s over before you even know what happened. It makes me feel so detached from society and ask, what is the point?

So driving the 14 hours to Nova Scotia left me with a lot of time to think, contemplate and try to get back into the head space where I believe in the goodness of humankind, and in the simple things in life. Stopping for a bite to eat the first evening, I got the pick me up I needed.

We have stopped at Irving rest stops many times. Sure, Irving is another big corporation that Maritimers have a love/hate relationship with. But you can’t deny that at least the meals on the road taste fairly home-cooked compared to that so-called food served up by that “restaurant” with the golden arches. Normally, the mood is low key…lots of truckers and travellers shovelling down their food; their goal to get in, get out and get back on the road again…

This evening however, I was taken aback by the positive mood when we walked into the restaurant. The air was absolutely electric. People actually looked up from their meals, to give you a smile or even with no gesture at all, just a transfer of energy. You could tell everyone was in high spirits. Even though this is a busy travel time, no one seemed to be in a hurry to get going. Just a relaxed, happy atmosphere that everyone seemed to be willing to bask in for this short period of time. A room full of complete strangers absolutely connected just by sharing their own good will and intentions through their energy. There was a cranky toddler at one end of the restaurant, but no one paid any mind (you usually see at least one person annoyed by the incessant crying). In fact I witnessed a lot of sympathetic smiles in the direction of the young tot.

After the hour we spent there, I felt immediately renewed, my faith restored in the simple things in life. I sat back in the van & enjoyed the passing Christmas lights that bounced off the pure white snow. Rick & I both remarked what a pleasant drive it was when we reached the hotel that night.

My Facebook pal, Sarah Smith shared this passage. I read it just before we left, and it was just what I needed to start the renewal I so needed. I share it with you now in case it fills you with the strength that I so needed right before the holidays:

Materialists & Spiritualists

“All those materialists who have never done anything to make their inner world habitable think only of amusing themselves in the outer world. As soon as they find themselves in their own company they’re bored; it’s inner poverty. Spiritualists, on the other hand, know how to make their inner world so orderly and beautiful it lacks nothing: poetry, colours, music… everything that’s beautiful is there, and they suffer when they are forced to ‘go out’ and leave this beauty behind. So now, think about it… How much time do you spend with others? A few minutes, a few hours. And how much time do you spend with yourself? All the time, day and night. Well, don’t you think it’s much more important to improve the place you never go out of? Why do you allow your inner space to get so run down, like a hovel, or like an attic where the windows are broken, where spiders are walking across the ceiling and the mice are having a great time.”

~ Omraam Mikhaël Aïvanhov

Namaste all, & Happy New Year. Thank you Sarah, for reminding me why I am the way I am…

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It’s a Sunday evening, & my mother has been dead for two weeks, 1 day. I can’t believe that time has seemly sped up again. From the time I officially heard from my dad she passed, ’til the time we left to come back to Montréal, time seemed to stand still. What would feel like hours would only be minutes. Now time seems to be back at that steady where-did-the-week-go pace as we slowly fall into life’s normal routine again.

I look at the pile of envelopes on the floor. About 10 first class air mail envelopes, all addressed all over the world, but mostly going to family in the Philippines. I can’t help but think this is where it all began, some 36+ years ago. A letter in an envelope just like this starting the friendship & then the romance that would become my parent’s marriage after three years of correspondence across the world. Now, these letters sit here with the terrible news that she is no longer with us in body. I found this handful of addresses from relatives and it is the only way we can get word to them. I hate that it has taken me two weeks to sit down and write them. When my grandmother died in 2003, my mother got the news 6 weeks after her passing. It appears that this will be the same timing.

I am also filled with hope that this correspondence will help me get to know the family I do not know. I am lucky to be surrounded by the support of family on my father’s side but I have always had a longing to know the other side.

It has been a touch & go weekend for me emotionally. It doesn’t help that it has rained every Saturday since my mother’s passing. It is the little things that draw me to sadness. Like seeing her favourite treats at the Asian grocery store or hearing her favourite hymn at Mass today. Yet, I dream of her & that is very comforting. She is already sending me messages that way. But sometimes I wake from dreams and think, it was just a dream right? She is still here…

Yet, she is still here. I merely have to ask for her guidance, and I get it. The process, continues…

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As Long As you Remember Me

As long as you remember me,
my memory will live on.
My spirit will be there with you
at every breaking dawn.
I’ll sing to you through birds in spring
and whisper through the trees,
I’ll bring you gentle comfort
with a warm, caressing breeze.
As long as you remember me,
my love will fill your heart
and help to ease the sorrow
that you feel while we’re apart.
With thoughts of me,
perhaps you’ll see the wonder of each day,
the joy of sunlit afternoons,
and nature’s grand display.
As long as you remember me,
I always will be near
to lend you sweet tranquility
as night time stars appear.
The bond that we have shared will be
a link from me to you
to give you hope for brighter days
and strength to see you through.

Catalina Satentes Gador Cleveland
December 24, 1953- October 25, 2008

(This poem was included on a In Memory bookmark by one of her friends at church. I am not sure of the author, I am assuming her friend penned it. It is beautiful, regardless).



Catalina Gador “Lynn” Cleveland, age 54, Windsor, passed away on Saturday, October 25th, 2008, at the Hants Community Hospital, Windsor.
Born on December 24th, 1953, in Leyte, Phillipines, she was the daughter of the late Eutguiano and Crispina Gador.

Lynn had studied in Manila Institution of Technology, was a Telegraphist, and had attended Teachers College, all in the Phillipines. She was a member of St. John the Evangelist Church, Windsor, a member of the Catholic Womens League, and was an avid worker and supporter of the church. Lynn immigrated to Canada with her husband, in September 1976. She was a stay at home mother, a very devoted wife, mother and grandmother and will be sadly missed by her family and friends.

She is survived by her husband of 33 years, Jerone Elwood Cleveland; daughter, Leilani (Rick) Deveau, Montreal; sons, Lyndon Cleveland and Adrian Cleveland, both at home; granddaughter, Sophie Deveau; sister, Edna Gador, Phillipines; brother, Gabriel, Manila, Phillipines.

Besides her parents, Eutquiano and Crispina Gador; she was predeceased by sister, VicVic.

Visitation will be held 7-9 p.m. Monday, October 27th,; also, 2-4 and 7-9 p.m. Tuesday, October 28th, in Lindsay’s Windsor Funeral Home, 194 King Street, Windsor.

Funeral Mass will be held at 10 a.m. Wednesday, October 29th, 2008, in St. John the Evangelist Roman Catholic Church, 339 King Street, Windsor, with the Rev. Father Michael J. Walsh officiating. Interment will be in the St. John’s Roman Catholic Cemetery, Wiley Ave., Windsor.

Family flowers only,

donations in memory of Lynn may be made to:

St. John the Evangelist Roman Catholic Church

(Heating System Fund)

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Now that we seem to have our rhythm down pat again, I wanted to post it here as a reminder to myself to keep it up and to perhaps help others plan their day.

I admit it is rather boring since my daughter is really young: once she is older I really want to schedule more nature/outdoor time.

I’m also going to put notes in there about sleep techniques that are working for us. Sophie is now sleeping 11 hours at night and I don’t remember the last time I had to get up in the middle of the night (except to pee! Hee!).

6am: we get up. Sophie starts to fuss and she greets me with a “Hi!” and a kiss on the cheek when I pick her up. Great way to start the day, esp. since I am so not a morning person!

6:10am-6:40am: after a bathroom pit stop Sophie has her milk, and then has potty time. I also take this time to get dressed, brush my teeth, etc.

6:40am-7:30+am: Independent play for Sophie in the play den, I check my messages & do a bit of work. I am currently designing my website in order to sell my jewelry online.

7:30+am: Sophie goes down for a nap between 7:30am and 8am, until 9am. I will also return to bed to nap at this time if I feel unrested. Otherwise, I do a bit more work on the computer.

9am: Sophie gets up, bath time & breakfast (Daddy makes breakfast). We do our bath in the morning as we found baths in the evening ramped her up rather than relaxed her.

10am: This varies. Sometimes we go for a walk, or run errands at this time, or Sophie & I start housework on the designated room/area for the day

11:15am: If we are home, Sophie has more milk, and then naps

1pm: Sophie gets up from her nap. Lunch time! Daddy makes lunch.

1:45pm: Usually independent play while I either do more work on the computer or finish up a chore. If we are out we make sure to get home around this time to Sophie can get down for a nap and be finished by 3pm. This is because when she sleeps later than 3, it may cause her to not get to sleep at bedtime, or sleep well through the night. If she had her 11am nap we may run errands at this time rather than in the morning.

2pm-3pm: If Sophie is napping at this time, I may take a nap, but usually this is more “me” time to catch up on my online groups, blog post, research for the website. I may sneak in an easy chore that is easier achieved while not having a baby around: dusting breakables, switching the laundry over, etc.

3pm-5pm: The afternoon is pretty open. Sophie & I finish the chores for the day, maybe spend sometime outside, let Sophie explore the now clean room/area of the house. She has a snack usually around 3:30. Sometimes if Rick wants a break we’ll take a quick trip to the post office or something.

5pm: Daddy makes supper, while Mommy & Sophie hang out in the livingroom. I usually take this time to have one-on-one tickle-the-baby time. :) Mommy also chats with Daddy while he cooks since our house is open concept. Ah, adult interaction. :) I can’t wait until she is older so the whole family can help out in the kitchen.

6pm: Dinner is finished. Sophie goes to the potty, then plays in her playroom while Mommy takes time to read in the room with her. Daddy does the dishes.

6:45pm: time to get ready for bed.

6:50pm: retreat to the calm of the bedroom, where Sophie has her milk, and I rock her for 5 min. afterward, which is just what she needs to get drowsy. Then, as I put her in her bed I tell her, “OK Sophie, Mommy is putting you in your bed now. It’s sleepy time. I’ll be right here if you need me”. I find if I don’t say this, she’ll wake up screaming 15 min. later.

7:10pm – 10+pm: ME TIME! This varies, I may fart around on the internet, do some work (design) if I feel inspired, read a book, watch some TV, spend some time with Rick…most nights it’s a little bit of all this.

I didn’t add all the pee potty time throughout the day, but it’s always after every nap, about 20-25min after liquids & every time I have to pee (which these days, is quite often). Hopefully she will start signing again soon so I won’t have to rely solely on timing, but this method seems to work the majority of the time.

As you can see, I have a lot of flexibility with this schedule, but this is the general flow that works for me. Some people’s rhythms are more structured than mine, again, it’s all about personality & what works for each person. I have a lot of leeway with this schedule as well. For example, I am sure to plan one cleaning day as easy, (Monday starts off with the room with least traffic), the next heavier, and I stagger accordingly. This way, if I miss a cleaning day due to appointments or an outing I can easily make up for it the following day. Or, if I feel inspired to double up on the cleaning one day, in order to get ahead.

I’m also flexible as to when I do what during computer time. Some days, I feel the need to write (blog) to get going. Today is a good example of that. I tend to start posts as I think of topics but not necessarily post them until I have the time to go through to proofread or finish them. Today I had a back log, so I decided to take part of the day to work on that to help get the juices flowing so to speak. Hence, all the posts today! I am going to do work tonight, because I am more inspired to do work now than I was earlier today. Besides, Rick is also working tonight, since he mowed the lawn this afternoon. Flex hours definitely suit both our personalities.

It is a lot of trial and error and I am still tweaking this one. Rhythms are always evolving, especially with growing children.

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As an addition to my original post, I wanted to also mention:

Find a tool of the trade that make your life easier.

In regards to cleaning, I am all for all natural disinfectants and not their chemical counterparts. What I am referring to is what tool could be changed that you now find cumbersome?

For me, it was vacuuming. It was loud, heavy & awkward, and could not be done when the baby was in the room, lest I want her to be deaf. I had to wait for Rick to have time on the weekend to vacuum, and with three cats, this simply wasn’t working. So I went out to find one of those people-powered push brooms for vacuuming my rugs. We have hardwood & ceramic throughout our house, so I needed something lightweight and quiet. I am all for living naturally, but we also live in a technological age. I so do not have the time to get on my hands & knees to scrub the floor by hand. Nor, would I want to! So I found the prefect tool. It is a Shark push broom, and this one actually has a small motor in it to help pick up the dirt. Even better, it was on sale half price at Canadian Tire: $20! I can’t say enough about this. I may have to go over the rug twice, but it does a fine job picking up all the dirt and hair, and it is so lightweight (and quiet) I can push it with one hand while having the baby on the other hip.

I wasn’t in the market for this, but when it saw it marked down to $30 from $69 I couldn’t resist. It is a Bissel vacuum mop, with a microfiber pad. I had been sweeping the floor and then dry mopping with a microfiber mop. It could not believe the extra dust & hair the microfiber mop will pick up after sweeping. This new gadget does both at the same time, cutting my floor cleaning time in half, and giving me more time to do things I enjoy, like, well, blog posting. :)

I find having a good cleaning rhythm means all the other parts of your life falls into place.

My original post on the topic here:

Finding My Rhythm Again

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